Archive for August 2011

The challenge this week was to rewrite a fairy tale from a different point of view, in a different genre or in a different time to the original tale. I have chosen the re-write Little Red Riding Hood in modern day England.

Little Red Riding Hoodie

Little Red Riding Hoodie had been given an ASBO for harassing the locals in her village. As part of this ASBO, she had been sentenced to 120 hours of community service and today was her first day. After turning up at the community centre in her trade mark red hoodie, that always covered most of her face, she was given orders to deliver some cakes to the old folks home at the other side of the woods.

Little Red Riding Hoodie reluctantly took the basket of cakes and sulked off towards the woods. As she mooched through the woods, a gang of older hoodies noticed her and the big bad gang leader, who was rather hairy, wanted to attack Little Red Riding Hoodie. However, the rest of the gang advised him not to do this in public or they would get an ASBO too but he ignored them and snuck up behind Little Red Riding Hoodie. “What’ve got there?” the big band gang leader shouted at Little Red Riding Hoodie. “It’s some cakes that I am being forced to take to the oldie’s across the woods”, replied Little Red Riding Hoodie. The big bad gang leader looked intrigued and asked “how do you get there?” It’s just down the end of this path”, Little Red Riding Hoodie replied wondering why on earth he wanted to know. In the next moment the big bad gang leader jumped on his BMX bike and rode off towards the old folks home so he could get there ahead of Little Red Riding Hoodie.

The big bad gang leader broke into the old people’s home through one of the windows and smacked a grannie over the head. He then put on her clothes and got into her bed whilst the rest of the gang put the grannie in a sack and took her away.

A few minutes later Little Red Riding Hoodie arrived with the cakes and starting flinging them at the elderly residents. As she arrived at the room where the big bad gang leader was waiting for her, she was miffed to be asked by the grannie to go in and speak to her. Little Red Riding Hoodie opened the door of the room and saw the grannie in bed. “oh Mrs, what huge ears you have” commented Little Red Riding Hoodie. “All the better to hear you with my dear” replied the big bad gang leader dressed as the grannie. “And you have huge eyes too” Little Red Riding Hoodie said with a laugh. “All the better to see you with” answered the big bad gang leader whilst getting out of bed. “That’s a pretty big pocket you have as well” sneered Little Red Riding Hoodie. “All the better to hide this hammer”, responded the big bad gang hoodie.  Then it all went dark for Little Red Riding Hoodie. The big bad gang leader had hit her over the head with the hammer and then tried to steal all her money.

At that moment, the nursing home’s woodcutter came into the room and saw that Little Red Riding Hoodie was lying unconscious on the floor. Believing that the grannie (who had dementia), was having a turn, he called for back-up and restrained the big bad gang leader. As the back-up put the big bad gang leader (still dressed up as the grannie) into bed and gave him a sedative, the woodcutter revived Little Red Riding Hoodie and helped her to her feet. Little Red Riding Hoodie was in shock that something like this would happen to her and finally understood what it was like to be a victim. She vowed never to harass anyone in her village again.

The big bad gang leader regained consciousness a couple of hours later in the grannie’s bedroom. He tried shouting to tell the nursing staff that he wasn’t really the old woman that he was really a young man but the nursing staff simply believed that the grannie was having another dementia flare up. The big bad gang leader eventually gave in and resigned himself to living in the old people’s home.

The moral of the story is that if you are nasty to people, people will do nasty things to you. If you do bad things, Karma will come back and bite you in the ass and you will get what you deserve!


This is the first poem I have ever written so bear with me!

Sitting in the hall, I watch at the door
Listening for the sound, post drops to the floor
I run up to see if it’s finally here
Disappointed, I sink, and shed but a tear
Please Mr Postman, bring me my post

Next day, I sit in the hall as before
Jump up when I hear a knock at the door
“Your post, here it is”, Mr Postman does say
I take and I rip and read straight away
Thanks Mr Postman, bringing my post

I love Harry potter. I grew up with it a I was only 11 when the first book came put but I think this is going too far. Network Rail have posters up at kings cross saying important information! Harry potter platform 9 3/4 this way!!


The task was to write a vignette using “we meet again” as our prompt. I have never heard of the term vignette before but the great god wikipedia said that it was a snap shot of a story where you learn a lot about the characters. I therefore hope that what I have written is actually a vignette! lol. Enjoy…

Jo couldn’t believe her eyes. Right in front of her was the love of her life, the one that got away, the man she had let walk out on her when they were only 27. She had always known she loved him but at 27 they had wanted different things so it wasn’t to be. Jo had travelled to New York with her work and she hadn’t anticipated seeing anyone she knew, let alone someone from her past. As she was thinking this, she turned around and looked at herself in the window and realised that she looked terrible. She had slept the whole eight hours of the flight and she had wild hair, makeup all across her face and trails of dribble down her chin. She had to get to the bathroom before he had a chance to see her. She had to look her best if she was going to speak to him again. Spinning around, with the intent to run straight to the wash rooms, Jo found herself face to face with HIM! She feebly said “Hi” and wished the ground would swallow her up whole.

Off to a 30th birthday BBQ today (let’s hope the weather holds out!). But this gets me wondering why people are so bothered about age. To me everyone looks the same whether they are 20, 40, 60 or 80 (and the ages in-between!).

Well I’m not reading Hamlet but I am reading all about As You Like It and Othello! Those, along with Henry V and Alpha Behn’s The Rover (which I have just finished reading) have made me feel like I should be speaking in ye olde English!

I am of the select group that actually love reading Shakespeare. I only understand about half the words but I get the general gist of the story. Having read the above for my A210 Open Uni course, I have added As You Like It to my favourites list of Twelfth Night and Much Ado About Nothing. It seems that I am most fond of the comedies! Sums me up really!

I wrote this several months ago as a first draft for a short story. It’s scary publishing it to the web but hope you like it!


Abi sat starring at her computer screen feeling empty. It was Friday night and here she was, a talented, beautiful 20 year old woman, sitting by herself with nothing else to do. She had been happy just a week earlier. Then she had, who she believed was an amazing man by her side. But as usual, she was wrong. He was just another cheating Bastard like the rest of them! Abi couldn’t help but feel that all men were the same. But she still felt lonely. She needed to get out of there and meet people. Just as she was thinking this, an advert for a dating website popped up on her screen. She had heard of it before but had always been cautious of these sorts of sites. “What is no one likes me?” Abi grimaced. But the want for companionship was stronger so Abi joined the website, posted her profile and waited in angst to see if anyone responded.

Within hours she had some ‘pokes’ from men in the local area but none that really caught her eye. But she felt better knowing that she obviously was attractive to the opposite sex! Abi had to share this with someone so she called her friend Jane. Jane was also single and looking, so Abi suggested she also joined the site. For the next few weeks the two of them got together to scroll through profiles of men looking for Mr right and laughing at those that were obviously Mr wrong!

Throughout those weeks Abi went on a handful of dates with some of the guys that she had met on the website. But sadly no sparks flied with any of them. Just as she was about to give up she received a ‘poke’ from a gorgeous bloke called James who lived just 20 minutes away. Abi thought he was dreamy but Jane wasn’t so sure. This didn’t deter Abi though as Jane had a habit of going for the bad guy. All Abi wanted was the boy next door who she could fall in love with. Abi sent James and email saying hi and within minutes he responded. Abi sat up all night emailing away with James, getting to know him better.

Abi continued to text James throughout the next week. She even spent time texting James when she was out on another date that had gone wrong! But she was getting eager to meet up with James and suggested they meet up at her local pub on the Friday.

Abi didn’t hear from James for several hours and was worried that she had scared him away. “Perhaps he wasn’t looking for a real girlfriend and just wanted to chat to someone online”, Abi worried away to herself. But all was forgotten when she received a reply from James agreeing to meet up and she danced around the room.

The next day Abi was as nervous as she had ever been and there was still a whole day to go before her date with James. She needed to take her mind off it so after work she went to her local with her friends Vicky and Lizzi. As they sat there chatting, Abi got a text from James saying he was going to try and find the pub that night so he knew where to go. That meant he was going to see her tonight as she was in that very pub! She decided not to mention this to him and just hope that he didn’t recognise her from her photo until the next day.

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August 2011
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